I talk about the importance of doing hard things. For grins I decided to go back to my first post last year and review what I have defined as being “hard things”.
RESPECT THE HARD THINGS: I wrote about a need for more decency and restraint. I talked about judgement of others and how we need to be less judgmental… and more understanding. I talked a little about Zwift and the general negativity some cyclists direct at those who utilize the tool – without ever fully understanding the reason behind it. For some, like my wife, it’s their option to “ride” and gain fitness.
COMFORT IS NOT YOUR FRIEND: This one encouraged you to “put yourself out there”. It discussed how “self-imposed” (voluntary) difficulty can help you learn to work through the many complicated mental traps we set for ourselves and ultimately keep us from reaching our fullest potential. The post ended with Make yourself available to others by doing hard things… and how creating this habit will fill your life with many amazing people. I shared this last part because I truly feel my life changed for the better when I filled it with people from the cycling community. I have been inspired to do more, work harder and attack things I had never done before. All of the positive in my life began with a willingness to step outside my comfort zone and take on risk.
WORDS: Here’s the first paragraph: Words create the world. We can use as few or as many words as we like. We can tell truth or tell lies. We can be direct or manipulative. We can be constructive and build people up or destructive and tear them down. We can save a life or we can take a life. In other words… this post was about taking responsibility for how we treat people and what we say to them. It was driven by my daily observation of how lazy, sloppy and mean many people tend to be day-to-day with their words.
THE FIRST DAY OF HUNTING: Journaled Cable and I going to deer camp. The highlight (aside from the 5-pointer) was his handling of adversity when a headlight died on our way back to camp after dark – and how well he handled it.
DON’T MAKE EXCUSES: Main points were as follows.. Stop pointing fingers and take personal accountability for your role in things, Stop blaming other people, Show up every day for everyone, Control your destiny, Stop measuring time and start measuring impact.
CALL TO ACTION: GET A JUMP ON 2018: I shared my personal goals for 2018 and encouraged others to do the same… before the traditional New Year resolution parade. It was intended to do nothing more than say – why wait? You’re probably gonna do this a month from now anyway… lets skip the unhealthy/unfocused habits of mid-November through December 31 and start early!
FORCE MULTIPLICATION: The essential point to this post was focused around what we do creates more of what we did. So if you go out and do good things I believe it will lead to the creation of more good things. If you go out and practice restraint I believe you will create more restraint from others around you. If your behavior is one of tolerance I believe those who you spend your time with will also practice restraint. I wanted everyone to think about what their actions are multiplying on a day-to-day basis.
WE WANT TO BE LIED TO: Stop talking about how busy you are. It’s just an excuse. I encouraged everyone to stop talking about how busy they are – dismantle the bomb of underachievement… I shared a very personal story about my oldest boy – and the very honest conversations I have had with him about pursuing his goals. The jest of the story was this – we’re not helping people by coddling them. We need to be honest with them – if we really love them or care. Most people do not want to hear the truth. When they ask you how they did – they want you to lie to them because the truth hurts. I feel we have an obligation to do the hard thing – and tell them what they need to do to reach their desired destination. Be compassionate… and honest.
THE ROAD AHEAD: 10 THINGS FOR 2018: Here’s all 10…
IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER…
- PRACTICE #DTHT to PREPARE your MIND and BODY FOR THE UNEXPECTED MOMENT when LIFE FORCES you to #DTHT.
- DO THE THINGS YOU’VE BEEN PUTTING OFF THAT WOULD MOST SIGNIFICANTLY CHANGE YOUR WORLD AND THE WORLD AROUND YOU.
- DON’T BUILD WALLS, BUILD BRIDGES.
- SERVE THE GREATER GOOD.
- #DTHT and SAY SOMETHING WHEN YOU WITNESS WRONG DOING.
- STOP MAKING EXCUSES.
- IT’S NOT ABOUT YOU ALL THE TIME. STOP FINDING WAYS TO BE OFFENDED.
- HOLD YOURSELF ACCOUNTABLE.
- RESPECT OPINIONS AND SEEK TO UNDERSTAND THEM.
- GO FOR A DAMN RIDE!
THE GREATER GOOD: Talks about serving a greater good – one beyond personal motivation. Doing things that serve others. It’s hard to put other people and other things first. Selfish is easy. The post ended with a story about a bike ride Cable and I went on… one that presented obstacles to him… that he worked through and by learning to work through them safely with his dad… helps prepare him for the difficulties that lie ahead in life he will certainly face… at some point after his father has passed away. Many of my posts, this one included, contain little stories of how I am introducing my kids to voluntary difficulty in order to prepare them for the unexpected difficulties they will certainly face one day… some after I have passed on.
WORK SMARTER, NOT HARDER: THE LIE: Pretty simple… the message is this – the balance has shifted in the wrong direction. You can’t always buy an app to make things easy and experience success. You need to work hard. You have to be able to put out more than you’re getting back at times. You have to be able to grind it out – not look for shortcuts. I’ll leave you with this quote direct from the post: Doing hard things voluntarily prepares you for the unpredictable moments you must face hard times without warning. You’ve created mental maps to work through adversity. You’re already been there, therefore, it is not uncharted territory! Your mind has been tested and prepared along with your body. You push through, you succeed and you move on. You crush the moment instead of the moment crushing you.
RAISING MEN: Posted the day after my birthday. A very personal story about my son’s pursuit of his basketball dream and my very honest guidance as a father. I talked about youth in general and our obligation to help them find the best version of themselves. I talked about honest feedback and not sugarcoating things for him – or anyone. If we truly love someone – we will tell them the truth.
A FORK IN THE TRAIL: A passionate post regarding our obligations to each other, the utilization of public resources, the importance of working together, respecting each other and the threats to our access of public lands. Basically, I said we need to find a way to work together to protect what we all love.
You’ve just read a recap of every post since the creation of www.doingthehardthings.com.
If you’ve made it this far… are you willing to answer a question(s)? Are you willing to do all of the Hard Things I have talked about in previous posts? Is the endeavor not inclusive? Does it not serve a greater good? If you do the Hard Things outlined above – would our communities and relationships benefit?
Today’s post will talk about Semantics and playing on words. I don’t know why… probably will never understand… but people flinch at the suggestion of DOING HARD THINGS… even when the hard things referenced above would create a better world.
I don’t buy this nonsense about “doing hard things.” – Anonymous
So to be clear… this person, if in fact referencing the #DTHT mission, is not on board with: decency and restraint, putting yourself out there, taking responsibility for how we treat people, creating safe challenges for youth to work through, measuring impact instead of time, getting a jump on things, multiplying GOOD, being honest and direct, my 10 Things for 2018, serving a greater good, working harder, helping people find the best version of themselves and working together.
“Hard things is when your Dad dies.” – Anonymous
Loss of loved ones is far beyond the Hard Things I am talking about. To suggest otherwise is a play on words, a disrespect of your intelligence and a bet against your ability to do your homework. If you read back through the #DTHT posts… can you really disagree with what I’m defining as hard things?
Doing Hard Things, by definition, directly specifies the activity as being VOLUNTARY or INTENTIONAL. Losing a loved one is not voluntary… it’s devastating. Definitely not intentional.
“Doing the Hard things” suggests we should engage in hard things voluntarily to prepare for the unexpected trials and tribulations life is sure to present – all which come without notice or forewarning.
I believe when a person attempts to compare the two (#DTHT and Catastrophic personal loss) it disrespects and minimizes the significance of both. This is the world we live in – someone is always out there trying to twist a message.
Last thought for the evening… there’s been a handful of people who want to take pot shots at #DTHT. Exactly ZERO percent of those folks have contacted me to ask what it’s all about… I venture to guess they haven’t even read all the posts. Instead… they heard something that in some way made them uncomfortable and reacted… without fully understanding the intent… or seeking clarification. Not surprising… as it would have required doing hard things.
I owe them a thank you… because their engagement with the message reminds me… this #DTHT is really important.